When it comes to infidelity in marriage, a cheating spouse unless they are so careless or just do not care will do everything in their power to cover their tracks.
After all they know that what they’re doing can destroy the entire marital relationship.
So the unfaithful husband does everything from lying to his spouse and everyone who might be considered a part of the injured party’s social circle. He may get people they trust to lie for them. That surprisingly is not usually that difficult. These people feel their first and unfortunately only obligation is to the one committing adultery not you.
In spite of all this you caught him. Your suspicions were right on the money so after doing some detective work and fact gathering you were more than prepared to confront them. After initially denying any wrong doing they broke down and confessed their infidelity.
This is a heavy load to bear because once you found out it feels like the whole world is crashing down upon you. You are having a hard time processing all the emotions and thoughts flooding in. You also are wondering should you end the marriage right now or try to work through it. At this point that is a tough call and no matter what happens the final decision will be yours. Your unfaithful husband has asked for forgiveness and is begging you to continue the marital relationship.
Yet they may also be doing something else which can add to the problem and that is directly or indirectly blaming you for their infidelity in marriage. What you did or should have done. They would never have even thought about straying if you had gotten with the program and made them unconditionally happy by being in tune to their wants and needs each and every minute of the day.
And too often particularly while emotions and thoughts are in a wild state of flux, the spouse who has been wronged falls for this. They start making excuses as to why their marriage partner did what they did and make the conscious decision to shoulder all the blame. In essence they are doing the exact same thing that the cheating spouse’s social group was willing to do and that is cover for them.
The bottom line is in the relationship you are going to make mistakes. That is the way it goes. What it does not mean is you are solely and totally responsible for your mate’s happiness. And you are also not responsible for taking all blame for what they did and for what they knew was wrong.
There are still a lot of things to work over before you decide to continue the marriage after infidelity and a major part of it is making sure that your significant other does not play these games with you. Of equal if not more importance in this instance is to not become a willing participant in covering up what they did. If not then while the relationship will go on it will be strictly on their terms which means their philandering can continue unabated since your unfaithful husband knows you got it covered.
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