Daryl Campbell
When you have been in a relationship for years that ends for whatever reason then getting back in the dating game can be very intimidating. The stress of anticipation can have you running to the doctor to get a prescription. With more than a few people, the very thought of getting back into it is just to much to handle. So they do not even try. They make peace with their solitude and that is that.
But you have decided that you will not go that route. No matter the outcome you are in the arena to stay or at least to you find that special someone who is compatible. You do not know if the person you recently met and decided to go out with for the first time is that special someone but you are determined to find out.
You have reminded yourself to meet someplace convenient, be on time, dress to impress and come ready with plenty of good topics to build conversation. In fact you may have put together a pretty good list of do’s and don’ts.
But it looks like one thing is missing and it’s a biggie. The kind of thing that could put you in a very negative light from your date’s point of view and increase the odds that you will not get a second date.
Try to the best of your abilities to avoid talking about your ex. It’s not that if the topic comes up in the course of the date that you must refuse at all cost to answer any questions about your ex. That might strike your date as very odd and the last thing you want to do on a first date is create uncertainty. If your date asks you then be as straightforward as you can without going into too much graphic detail. Answer with tact and as much brevity as the situation allows.
All this however is predicated on whether your date asks you about previous relationships. If they do not then stay away from bringing up the subject altogether. Your date is not there to analyze what may or may not have gone wrong between you and your ex.
And talking about your ex can give the wrong impression; namely that you are comparing. Your ex liked this or didn’t like that. Something occurs during the date and wouldn’t you know it, your ex used to react the same way?
Turnoff city. When that happens your date will be looking to end this date post haste.
If you had wonderful times with your ex than by all means treasure them but leave it in storage when you are out dating someone new. Besides, think about how you would feel if your date decided to take that stroll down memory lane and prattle on about their ex. As far as you are concerned the ex would be short for exit.